curious conversations about sex
Join us, as we deep-dive into sexuality with our podcast, Curious Conversations About Sex. Topics range from the simple through to the ridiculously complex, and from the humorous to the profoundly serious. We often drag in related things like relationship issues, gender, and so forth; so long as it somehow relates to sex, it's up for grabs.
Ep 89 Re 10: What's it like being a public figure in the field of sexuality?
I'm still here. I still love you.
Since we last spoke, a lot of extraordinary things happened, resulting in me stopping workshops kind of abruptly, and selling The Practice Lab.
I will probably say more about all of that in a future episode, but for now, perhaps as a down-payment on some of that, let's listen back all the way to 2017, with Barbara Carrellas and Cyndi Darnell.
So I'll probably do an episode about that.
And I'm planning on doing a whole bunch of episodes after that on where I think the gender movement needs to go. Quietly excited.
But in truth, I'm doing one step at a time at the moment, and I have no idea what's next. It's ace. You should maybe try it. Or not.
But if you're wondering if I'm dropping the podcast... At least at this point in time, no. Our love would appear to be safe, to the extent that love can ever be considered safe.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com.
Curious Creatures can be found at www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
I'm still here. I still love you.
Since we last spoke, a lot of extraordinary things happened, resulting in me stopping workshops kind of abruptly, and selling The Practice Lab.
I will probably say more about all of that in a future episode, but for now, perhaps as a down-payment on some of that, let's listen back all the way to 2017, with Barbara Carrellas and Cyndi Darnell.
So I'll probably do an episode about that.
And I'm planning on doing a whole bunch of episodes after that on where I think the gender movement needs to go. Quietly excited.
But in truth, I'm doing one step at a time at the moment, and I have no idea what's next. It's ace. You should maybe try it. Or not.
But if you're wondering if I'm dropping the podcast... At least at this point in time, no. Our love would appear to be safe, to the extent that love can ever be considered safe.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com.
Curious Creatures can be found at www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Ep 88: The Death Cult Club, Lomi Lomi, and Integrated Oncology with Alice Peebles
Today, we talking about the Death Cult Club, Lomi Lomi, and Integrated Oncology with Alice Peebles. It includes a couple of side-journeys around consent and trauma-informed practice, and touches on Alice’s and Rog’s personal Death Cult Club Goals.
Oh, and some tips on how you can start your own Death Cult Club!
Links:
Alice's Lomi Lomi practice (Upwey, Melbourne, Australia): www.blisstitute.com/vic-practitioners-lomilomi-massage
Melbourne Integrative Oncology Group: www.miog.com.au/meet-the-miog-team.html
Curious Creatures / Curious Conversations About Sex: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Today, we talking about the Death Cult Club, Lomi Lomi, and Integrated Oncology with Alice Peebles. It includes a couple of side-journeys around consent and trauma-informed practice, and touches on Alice’s and Rog’s personal Death Cult Club Goals.
Oh, and some tips on how you can start your own Death Cult Club!
Links:
Alice's Lomi Lomi practice (Upwey, Melbourne, Australia): www.blisstitute.com/vic-practitioners-lomilomi-massage
Melbourne Integrative Oncology Group: www.miog.com.au/meet-the-miog-team.html
Curious Creatures / Curious Conversations About Sex: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 87: Is your gender identity or flexible? Is it innate, or the product of socialisation, including trauma?...With Avgi Saketopoulou.
Today, we're chatting about gender, and how your identity is influenced by the events you experience in your life. The conversation is especially interested in how minority genders such as non-binary and trans identities are formed, and how there's healthy and less than healthy ways that plays out.
My guest is Avgi Saketopoulou, who along with Ann Pellegrini, has recently written a book called "Gender without Identity".
Gender Without Identity on Amazon: www.amazon.com.au/GENDER-WITHOUT-IDENTITY-Avgi-Saketopoulou/dp/1942254199
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Click here to listen!
Today, we're chatting about gender, and how your identity is influenced by the events you experience in your life. The conversation is especially interested in how minority genders such as non-binary and trans identities are formed, and how there's healthy and less than healthy ways that plays out.
My guest is Avgi Saketopoulou, who along with Ann Pellegrini, has recently written a book called "Gender without Identity".
Gender Without Identity on Amazon: www.amazon.com.au/GENDER-WITHOUT-IDENTITY-Avgi-Saketopoulou/dp/1942254199
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Click here to listen!
Ep 86: Re 39: When things go wrong, or not as planed.
Today, answering the question, of what to do when things go wrong - especially when you're topping.
To answer it, I'm back with Seani Love, an award-winning sex-worker and workshop facilitator. The conversation comes across like you've walked in on a couple of kinky therapists having a chat, which is precisely what it is - a nuanced deep-dive into exactly what emotional safety looks like in practice, from a couple of folks that have made mistakes and learned from them.
You can find Seani at www.seanilove.com.
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Click here to listen!
Today, answering the question, of what to do when things go wrong - especially when you're topping.
To answer it, I'm back with Seani Love, an award-winning sex-worker and workshop facilitator. The conversation comes across like you've walked in on a couple of kinky therapists having a chat, which is precisely what it is - a nuanced deep-dive into exactly what emotional safety looks like in practice, from a couple of folks that have made mistakes and learned from them.
You can find Seani at www.seanilove.com.
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Click here to listen!
Ep 85: Lee Harrington on self-care. Also gender, relationships, community.
Lee Harrington, who's been on the show a couple of times previously, has recently written the book "Becoming Your Own Beloved". It's a wild investment in yourself, and a radical piece of activism against some modern dilemmas.
Lee and Rog talk self-care, gender, lateral violence in minority gender groups, and some good old life philosophy.
Lee's book: www.amazon.com.au/Become-Your-Own-Beloved-Self-Connection/dp/1637589034
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Lee Harrington, who's been on the show a couple of times previously, has recently written the book "Becoming Your Own Beloved". It's a wild investment in yourself, and a radical piece of activism against some modern dilemmas.
Lee and Rog talk self-care, gender, lateral violence in minority gender groups, and some good old life philosophy.
Lee's book: www.amazon.com.au/Become-Your-Own-Beloved-Self-Connection/dp/1637589034
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 84: Reaction video to Jordan Peterson on birth control and promiscuous sex (minus video)
Today, I'm doing a reaction video to a Jordan Peterson interview, except without the video. So I'm just having a reaction, I guess.
In the original interview, which I'll link to in the shownotes, Jordan is speaking about sex, consent, and sex outside of marriage. On top of that, I want to add another couple of thoughts on things Jordan at the end.
Heads up, this is mostly just me disagreeing with Jordan, but not all of it. He raises some good points, and honestly, it'd be interesting to get his take on a few things without the intensity of the polarised social media landscape he exists in; so much of what he says is a polarised response to a polarised attack, and it can be hard to actually get a sense of a person with all that noise.
Link to original interview: www.youtube.com/watch?v=6spdAstl34A&t=1s&ab_channel=JohnAnderson
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Link to Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm doing a reaction video to a Jordan Peterson interview, except without the video. So I'm just having a reaction, I guess.
In the original interview, which I'll link to in the shownotes, Jordan is speaking about sex, consent, and sex outside of marriage. On top of that, I want to add another couple of thoughts on things Jordan at the end.
Heads up, this is mostly just me disagreeing with Jordan, but not all of it. He raises some good points, and honestly, it'd be interesting to get his take on a few things without the intensity of the polarised social media landscape he exists in; so much of what he says is a polarised response to a polarised attack, and it can be hard to actually get a sense of a person with all that noise.
Link to original interview: www.youtube.com/watch?v=6spdAstl34A&t=1s&ab_channel=JohnAnderson
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Link to Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 83: Jealous with Joli
Today, we're chatting with Joli about jealousy - how it's an awesome thing waiting to happen, what to put in place to avoid unnecessary amounts of it, how it pairs with attachment styles, and how to talk about it. Also, a bunch of thoughts on starting poly, navigating poly, and some relationship ideas that are good for mono and poly styles.
Joli Hamilton can be found at https://www.jolihamilton.com/
Link to two-day workshop 'Adventurous Touch and Intimacy': https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/adventurous-touch-and-intimacy.html
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/
Link to Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Today, we're chatting with Joli about jealousy - how it's an awesome thing waiting to happen, what to put in place to avoid unnecessary amounts of it, how it pairs with attachment styles, and how to talk about it. Also, a bunch of thoughts on starting poly, navigating poly, and some relationship ideas that are good for mono and poly styles.
Joli Hamilton can be found at https://www.jolihamilton.com/
Link to two-day workshop 'Adventurous Touch and Intimacy': https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/adventurous-touch-and-intimacy.html
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/
Link to Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 82: An Apology To Religions
A revisit of comments Rog made in the last episode, particularly around a criticism of the grass-roots Christian movement. (This is one of those rare times where we strongly recommend you listen to that episode first).
Link to two-day workshop 'Adventurous Touch and Intimacy': https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/adventurous-touch-and-intimacy.html
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/
Link to Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
A revisit of comments Rog made in the last episode, particularly around a criticism of the grass-roots Christian movement. (This is one of those rare times where we strongly recommend you listen to that episode first).
Link to two-day workshop 'Adventurous Touch and Intimacy': https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/adventurous-touch-and-intimacy.html
Link to the Curious Creatures forum: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/
Link to Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 81: Exposing Australia's Biggest Sex Scandal
Today, we're getting back to our journalistic roots, and exposing one of Australia's biggest sex scandals. You might be wondering why an otherwise light and accessible sexuality podcast would venture into such territory, however the editorial team here at Curious Conversations About Sex felt that if we're to explore the positive elements of sex, then perhaps it's important that we provide a contextual reference point regarding what you might regard as the dark underbelly of the movement.
The most wild thing about the sex scandal that we're delving into today, is that it's been happening in plain sight, right under your nose... for decades. By exploiting a legal grey area and posing as something that it clearly isn't, it's managed to somehow avoid the attention of regulators, law enforcement, and a largely unsuspecting public... Until now.
Click here to listen!
Today, we're getting back to our journalistic roots, and exposing one of Australia's biggest sex scandals. You might be wondering why an otherwise light and accessible sexuality podcast would venture into such territory, however the editorial team here at Curious Conversations About Sex felt that if we're to explore the positive elements of sex, then perhaps it's important that we provide a contextual reference point regarding what you might regard as the dark underbelly of the movement.
The most wild thing about the sex scandal that we're delving into today, is that it's been happening in plain sight, right under your nose... for decades. By exploiting a legal grey area and posing as something that it clearly isn't, it's managed to somehow avoid the attention of regulators, law enforcement, and a largely unsuspecting public... Until now.
Click here to listen!
Ep 80: About Your Hardware (bonus episode)
Today, I've hand-selected a bonus episode for you.
It's from the podcast 'Come As You Are', and it's about your hardware - by which I mean, your genitals, junk, hoo-har, your funky fandangle, whatever it is you call it.
More specifically, it's about how all of our genitals have things in common, and how we all get formed from the same stock. I love that stuff, how it breaks down a lot of the idea that we're like completely separate and incomparable creatures, based on our genitals, with no experiences or problems in common.
The episode starts with a listener calling in to ask about their partner's bent dick, but it quickly expands out to include other genital configurations in a nice and body-positive way.
Click here to listen!
Today, I've hand-selected a bonus episode for you.
It's from the podcast 'Come As You Are', and it's about your hardware - by which I mean, your genitals, junk, hoo-har, your funky fandangle, whatever it is you call it.
More specifically, it's about how all of our genitals have things in common, and how we all get formed from the same stock. I love that stuff, how it breaks down a lot of the idea that we're like completely separate and incomparable creatures, based on our genitals, with no experiences or problems in common.
The episode starts with a listener calling in to ask about their partner's bent dick, but it quickly expands out to include other genital configurations in a nice and body-positive way.
Click here to listen!
Ep 79: Interview with Fiona Patten (Reason Party, formerly Sex
Party)
Today, I’m having a fast and exciting conversation with Fiona Patten, who leads the Australian Reason Party. We get into politics, sex, gender equality, and collaboration as an alternative to the adversarial political system. Oh, and we touch on assisted dying, drug legalisation, and a bunch of other stuff.
What stands out for me about this conversation is how *real* it is. That wouldn’t normally stand out, but it’s quite an impressive quality in a politician. I found it refreshing.
Click here to listen!
Party)
Today, I’m having a fast and exciting conversation with Fiona Patten, who leads the Australian Reason Party. We get into politics, sex, gender equality, and collaboration as an alternative to the adversarial political system. Oh, and we touch on assisted dying, drug legalisation, and a bunch of other stuff.
What stands out for me about this conversation is how *real* it is. That wouldn’t normally stand out, but it’s quite an impressive quality in a politician. I found it refreshing.
Click here to listen!
Ep 78: Re-Ep Jessica Drake re porn, sex-education
I've been going on a lot lately about the way porn winds up being sex education if there's no other sex education available, and how that's sometimes a good thing and sometimes maybe not such a good thing.
So I thought it would be great to go back and listen to this episode from 2019 with Jessica Blake, who's a porn performer wrestling with just that problem. Take it away, historical Rog and Jessica...
Click here to listen!
I've been going on a lot lately about the way porn winds up being sex education if there's no other sex education available, and how that's sometimes a good thing and sometimes maybe not such a good thing.
So I thought it would be great to go back and listen to this episode from 2019 with Jessica Blake, who's a porn performer wrestling with just that problem. Take it away, historical Rog and Jessica...
Click here to listen!
Ep 77: Rog being interviewed by Choose Love Podcast
Today, I'm being interviewed by Steve from the Choose Love Podcast. Since he was interviewing me, some of it's about me and how I came to be doing what I do... Then from there, we launch into what's going on for most people in the world of sex, how sex education is meeting our needs or just, like, totally failing, and what I've learned along the way.
I found it to be a really enjoyable chat, I hope you do too.
Search your podcast app for the "Choose Love" podcast.
Curious Creatures' Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm being interviewed by Steve from the Choose Love Podcast. Since he was interviewing me, some of it's about me and how I came to be doing what I do... Then from there, we launch into what's going on for most people in the world of sex, how sex education is meeting our needs or just, like, totally failing, and what I've learned along the way.
I found it to be a really enjoyable chat, I hope you do too.
Search your podcast app for the "Choose Love" podcast.
Curious Creatures' Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 76: The Sex Education I Wish I'd Received As A Teen
This is the no-bullshit, all honesty, useful sex education that most teenagers never receive, myself included.
Click here to listen!
This is the no-bullshit, all honesty, useful sex education that most teenagers never receive, myself included.
Click here to listen!
Ep 75: Blowing Your Mind About Dick-Pics
I would like to see if I can blow your mind, at least a little bit, regarding unsolicited dick-pics. Actually, what's happening in this episode, is that you get to listen in on a conversation I had with two people, where I set about blowing their minds about dick-pics - about the phenomenal circumstances that lead to their existence, and the surprising array of things that are going to need to change to fix the problem.
Settle in for an entertaining and enlightening conversation.
Tess, who appears on today’s episode, is an Occupational Therapist with a speciality in sexuality. Find them at www.connectabletherapies.com.
Give us your thoughts about today’s episode! Sign up to our forum at forum.curiouscreatures.biz.
Once you’ve signed up, join the Curious Conversations About Sex group, and join the conversations: forum.curiouscreatures.biz/g/CCAS_chat_group.
Our Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Our pre-recorded sexuality workshops and everything else Curious Creatures offers: www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
I would like to see if I can blow your mind, at least a little bit, regarding unsolicited dick-pics. Actually, what's happening in this episode, is that you get to listen in on a conversation I had with two people, where I set about blowing their minds about dick-pics - about the phenomenal circumstances that lead to their existence, and the surprising array of things that are going to need to change to fix the problem.
Settle in for an entertaining and enlightening conversation.
Tess, who appears on today’s episode, is an Occupational Therapist with a speciality in sexuality. Find them at www.connectabletherapies.com.
Give us your thoughts about today’s episode! Sign up to our forum at forum.curiouscreatures.biz.
Once you’ve signed up, join the Curious Conversations About Sex group, and join the conversations: forum.curiouscreatures.biz/g/CCAS_chat_group.
Our Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Our pre-recorded sexuality workshops and everything else Curious Creatures offers: www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Ep 74: Show Update (We're Back!) and BONUS Episode: Hot Money
I've got great news... this podcast is back, baby!
I'm looking forward to being back in your ears, starting with a cracker of a conversation in about a week.
In the meanwhile, I'm going to pop in a bonus episode from our friends over at Pushkin. It's the first episode from a podcast of theirs called Hot Money, and it's about the business machinations of what goes on in the porn industry. I find this interesting, because... Well, you've heard me complain from time to time about what happens when porn that's designed as entertainment is mistaken for education. I'm not anti-porn, and nor is Hot Money, but there are some drawbacks to how things are playing out that we need to reckon with.
This episode totally explores the business side of what's driving that confusion, and articulates why a decent chunk of the sector is driven by motivations that are a long way from being educational in their intention, or from wanting to make the world a better place.
Give us your thoughts about today’s episode! Sign up to our forum at https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/.
Once you’ve signed up, join the Curious Conversations About Sex group: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/g/CCAS_chat_group.
Today’s bonus episode from Pushkin, ‘Hot Money’: https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/hot-money.
Our Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Our pre-recorded sexuality workshops and everything else Curious Creatures offers: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/.
Click here to listen!
I've got great news... this podcast is back, baby!
I'm looking forward to being back in your ears, starting with a cracker of a conversation in about a week.
In the meanwhile, I'm going to pop in a bonus episode from our friends over at Pushkin. It's the first episode from a podcast of theirs called Hot Money, and it's about the business machinations of what goes on in the porn industry. I find this interesting, because... Well, you've heard me complain from time to time about what happens when porn that's designed as entertainment is mistaken for education. I'm not anti-porn, and nor is Hot Money, but there are some drawbacks to how things are playing out that we need to reckon with.
This episode totally explores the business side of what's driving that confusion, and articulates why a decent chunk of the sector is driven by motivations that are a long way from being educational in their intention, or from wanting to make the world a better place.
Give us your thoughts about today’s episode! Sign up to our forum at https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/.
Once you’ve signed up, join the Curious Conversations About Sex group: https://forum.curiouscreatures.biz/g/CCAS_chat_group.
Today’s bonus episode from Pushkin, ‘Hot Money’: https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/hot-money.
Our Consent Cards: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html.
Our pre-recorded sexuality workshops and everything else Curious Creatures offers: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/.
Click here to listen!
Ep 73 : Show update
Things are busy, as we come out of lockdown. This episode is an update about that.
In short, Curious Conversations About Sex is taking a break. We suggest just leaving us subscribed in your feed, and at some stage in the future, we hope to be in your ears again.
Click here to listen!
Things are busy, as we come out of lockdown. This episode is an update about that.
In short, Curious Conversations About Sex is taking a break. We suggest just leaving us subscribed in your feed, and at some stage in the future, we hope to be in your ears again.
Click here to listen!
Ep 72 : Re-ep 45 Restorative Justice part two
Today, we’re looking into Restorative Justice again; this is the second in a two-part series, and I hate to do this to you, but I need you to go back and listen to the previous episode, if you haven’t already. Seriously, a bunch of stuff in the following episode won’t make sense, and I’m worried about how some things might sound out of context. It’ll be worth it, because this is a really juicy topic.
Rog, from Curious Creatures www.curiouscreatures.biz, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
- Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu/sociology/faculty/karp.php.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Through the Victorian Government’s family violence unit: www.justice.vic.gov.au/fvrjservice
Through RMIT: www.cij.org.au/opencircle
Paid practitioner training: www.aarj.org.au/training
Click here to listen!
Today, we’re looking into Restorative Justice again; this is the second in a two-part series, and I hate to do this to you, but I need you to go back and listen to the previous episode, if you haven’t already. Seriously, a bunch of stuff in the following episode won’t make sense, and I’m worried about how some things might sound out of context. It’ll be worth it, because this is a really juicy topic.
Rog, from Curious Creatures www.curiouscreatures.biz, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
- Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu/sociology/faculty/karp.php.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Through the Victorian Government’s family violence unit: www.justice.vic.gov.au/fvrjservice
Through RMIT: www.cij.org.au/opencircle
Paid practitioner training: www.aarj.org.au/training
Click here to listen!
Ep 71 : Re-ep 44 Restorative Justice part one
Today, we're listening back to the first of two episodes from 2019, on Restorative Justice.
I've chosen these episodes to listen to again because I got a lot of positive feedback from other listeners about these episodes - to which I'd add that they're two of my faves, too.
At the end, I'll provide a bit of an update on some services that are available to those of you in Melbourne, Australia, where Curious Creatures are based.
Now let's get to it...
Today, we’re talking about one of the only sources of hope, in an area most of us generally feel pretty hopeless about.
When sexual assault occurs, it often changes the lives of the people that are directly involved, and also those around them. It’s like a pivotal event, a moment in time, that patterns everything that comes afterwards, and the thing that’s so hopeless about it is that there seems to be so little in the way of anything resembling a positive outcome, for anyone.
Restorative Justice is a form of mediation where the fundamental idea is that the people that were involved in an incident, actually sit down and try and work out what justice might look like.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
-Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Through the Victorian Government’s family violence unit: www.justice.vic.gov.au
Through RMIT: www.cij.org.au
Paid practitioner training: www.aarj.org.au
Click here to listen!
Today, we're listening back to the first of two episodes from 2019, on Restorative Justice.
I've chosen these episodes to listen to again because I got a lot of positive feedback from other listeners about these episodes - to which I'd add that they're two of my faves, too.
At the end, I'll provide a bit of an update on some services that are available to those of you in Melbourne, Australia, where Curious Creatures are based.
Now let's get to it...
Today, we’re talking about one of the only sources of hope, in an area most of us generally feel pretty hopeless about.
When sexual assault occurs, it often changes the lives of the people that are directly involved, and also those around them. It’s like a pivotal event, a moment in time, that patterns everything that comes afterwards, and the thing that’s so hopeless about it is that there seems to be so little in the way of anything resembling a positive outcome, for anyone.
Restorative Justice is a form of mediation where the fundamental idea is that the people that were involved in an incident, actually sit down and try and work out what justice might look like.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
-Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Through the Victorian Government’s family violence unit: www.justice.vic.gov.au
Through RMIT: www.cij.org.au
Paid practitioner training: www.aarj.org.au
Click here to listen!
Ep 70 : Opening Up To Opening Up
Tess and I created the workshop ‘Opening Up To Opening Up’, as a deep-dive into the world of non-monogamy. We’ve had a think about which bits might be interesting here on the podcast, and would like to share with you the chapters on mythbusting, agreements, and jealousy.
A lot of this stuff is relevant to all relationship styles, not just non-monogamous ones. And if you’re not poly, it’ll certainly give you a little more insight into what goes on in this world.
These recordings are taken from the pre-recorded version of Opening Up To Opening Up: www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up-pre-recorded.html
Curious Creatures are at: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Tess and I created the workshop ‘Opening Up To Opening Up’, as a deep-dive into the world of non-monogamy. We’ve had a think about which bits might be interesting here on the podcast, and would like to share with you the chapters on mythbusting, agreements, and jealousy.
A lot of this stuff is relevant to all relationship styles, not just non-monogamous ones. And if you’re not poly, it’ll certainly give you a little more insight into what goes on in this world.
These recordings are taken from the pre-recorded version of Opening Up To Opening Up: www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up-pre-recorded.html
Curious Creatures are at: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 69 : Playing with the concept of advantage
Okay. Today, we're angling in the general direction of getting more insight around a very juicy topic.
To do that, I'm going to give you some of the theory from one of my workshops, called "Playing with the cards you've been dealt". I promise, this is not a teaser, where you then have to pay for the workshop to get anything interesting or worthwhile. I'm giving you a whole chunk of stand-alone material right here, right now - it's just that I'm stealing it from one of my workshops. Ha ha, joke's on me.
The four categories of advantage / privilege discussed are:
More information here: www.curiouscreatures.biz/power-rank-and-privilege-playing-with-the-cards-you-have.html
Curious Creatures are at: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Okay. Today, we're angling in the general direction of getting more insight around a very juicy topic.
To do that, I'm going to give you some of the theory from one of my workshops, called "Playing with the cards you've been dealt". I promise, this is not a teaser, where you then have to pay for the workshop to get anything interesting or worthwhile. I'm giving you a whole chunk of stand-alone material right here, right now - it's just that I'm stealing it from one of my workshops. Ha ha, joke's on me.
The four categories of advantage / privilege discussed are:
- Physical
- Social / Structural
- Psychological
- Spiritual
More information here: www.curiouscreatures.biz/power-rank-and-privilege-playing-with-the-cards-you-have.html
Curious Creatures are at: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 68 : Two (poly) Couples with Cancer Walk into a Bar
Sex and cancer.
If you think this doesn't apply to you, you're almost certainly wrong. About one in two, or maybe one in three of us, will have cancer at some stage in our lives. But almost all of us will have someone close to us get cancer, and so will find ourselves as partners or carers getting an intimate relationship with cancer one way or another.
In this episode, my partner Tess and I invite another couple over for a game of Q&A around the themes of sex, cancer, relationships, and intimacy. Tori and Drew, the other couple, just want to be referred to by their first names.
It so happens that all four people are polyamorous, and it's interesting to see how polyamory played into the cancer diagnosis and treatment process. To hint at what's coming up, let's just say that being poly wasn't at all a bad thing.
This episode will also make a lot of sense to anyone that's got a chronic illness, a disability, or some other health crisis.
Tess Deveze's course for couples with cancer: www.connectionandcancer.com
Tess Deveze's general page: www.connectabletherapies.com
Click here to listen!
Sex and cancer.
If you think this doesn't apply to you, you're almost certainly wrong. About one in two, or maybe one in three of us, will have cancer at some stage in our lives. But almost all of us will have someone close to us get cancer, and so will find ourselves as partners or carers getting an intimate relationship with cancer one way or another.
In this episode, my partner Tess and I invite another couple over for a game of Q&A around the themes of sex, cancer, relationships, and intimacy. Tori and Drew, the other couple, just want to be referred to by their first names.
It so happens that all four people are polyamorous, and it's interesting to see how polyamory played into the cancer diagnosis and treatment process. To hint at what's coming up, let's just say that being poly wasn't at all a bad thing.
This episode will also make a lot of sense to anyone that's got a chronic illness, a disability, or some other health crisis.
Tess Deveze's course for couples with cancer: www.connectionandcancer.com
Tess Deveze's general page: www.connectabletherapies.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 67 (Re 25) : Consent is Sexy
Today, we're dropping back in on an episode from 2017, on the question of whether or not consent is sexy.
The background, btw, is that in trying to sell the idea of consent, for most of the last 50 years we've taken a perspective of using the stick, rather than the carrot; we've said "Do consent, because it's the right thing to do, and doing anything else is wrong".
That's not an inaccurate statement, but it's not a particularly positive message, and so a movement sprang up more recently to sell the idea that Consent is sexy... ie. it will lead you to the things you want.
The idea is that more people will listen to that message, however others feel that it waters down, or detracts from, the original message.
My guests are two sex educators; Dossie Easton, based in San-Fransisco, and Anne Hunter, based in Melbourne.
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Conversations About Sex forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Dossie Easton: www.dossieeaston.com
Anne Hunter: www.annehunter.com.au
Click here to listen!
Today, we're dropping back in on an episode from 2017, on the question of whether or not consent is sexy.
The background, btw, is that in trying to sell the idea of consent, for most of the last 50 years we've taken a perspective of using the stick, rather than the carrot; we've said "Do consent, because it's the right thing to do, and doing anything else is wrong".
That's not an inaccurate statement, but it's not a particularly positive message, and so a movement sprang up more recently to sell the idea that Consent is sexy... ie. it will lead you to the things you want.
The idea is that more people will listen to that message, however others feel that it waters down, or detracts from, the original message.
My guests are two sex educators; Dossie Easton, based in San-Fransisco, and Anne Hunter, based in Melbourne.
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Curious Conversations About Sex forum: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Consent Cards: www.curiouscreatures.biz/consentcards.html
Dossie Easton: www.dossieeaston.com
Anne Hunter: www.annehunter.com.au
Click here to listen!
Ep 66: Success for Slackers
I wrote a book, and I'm going to read some of it to you today.
It's got nothing to do with sex, but it's on a topic I know many of you find interesting.
It's called 'Success for Slackers', and it's about how to come up with a business or a role that's good for you, good for the people around you, and good for whatever planet you happen to be on.
Find out more about the book (and workshop): www.curiouscreatures.biz/success-for-slackers-book.html
Buy the book on Amazon: www.amazon.com.au/dp/B08WHZLJ3T
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
I wrote a book, and I'm going to read some of it to you today.
It's got nothing to do with sex, but it's on a topic I know many of you find interesting.
It's called 'Success for Slackers', and it's about how to come up with a business or a role that's good for you, good for the people around you, and good for whatever planet you happen to be on.
Find out more about the book (and workshop): www.curiouscreatures.biz/success-for-slackers-book.html
Buy the book on Amazon: www.amazon.com.au/dp/B08WHZLJ3T
Curious Creatures: www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 65: How to have an 'altered states' date
Today, I want to share with you some ideas on how to have an ‘altered states’ date.
From a psychological perspective, an altered state is a state of mind that is different from whatever you regard as your normal. It means that the way your mind is working, or the way you’re feeling, is somehow different, and you can’t immediately get back to whatever your ‘normal’ is.
Sometimes you can be in an altered state for no apparent reason, but sometimes there’s an obvious cause, like insomnia, or heavy anxiety, or the experience of being madly in love with someone, or being triggered from a strong psychological experience. And so forth.
You are also, of course, in an altered state when you consume alcohol or other drugs, and that’s what we’re talking about today. Specifically, we’re talking about the use of the illegal drug MDMA for the purposes of getting into an altered state with a partner, and having why I call an ‘altered states date’.
Click here to listen!
Today, I want to share with you some ideas on how to have an ‘altered states’ date.
From a psychological perspective, an altered state is a state of mind that is different from whatever you regard as your normal. It means that the way your mind is working, or the way you’re feeling, is somehow different, and you can’t immediately get back to whatever your ‘normal’ is.
Sometimes you can be in an altered state for no apparent reason, but sometimes there’s an obvious cause, like insomnia, or heavy anxiety, or the experience of being madly in love with someone, or being triggered from a strong psychological experience. And so forth.
You are also, of course, in an altered state when you consume alcohol or other drugs, and that’s what we’re talking about today. Specifically, we’re talking about the use of the illegal drug MDMA for the purposes of getting into an altered state with a partner, and having why I call an ‘altered states date’.
Click here to listen!
Ep 64: Kink & BDSM, the scene, safe-words, and lots of laughter
Today, I'm being interviewed by the crew from Off The Cuffs, which is a podcast with a focus on bdsm and the lifestyle around it.
These folks are funny - I like them. Their names are Dick-Wound, Minimus Maximus, and Lexual Romance. The conversation covers one of my favorite kinks - bum-drumming, kinky scenes as a form of creative expression, the nuances of using safe-words, and a bit about Curiosity, the sexuality event I run.
They've got a pretty casual, conversational style, and we start straight in, without any warmup. They've just asked me to talk about a time when things haven't gone as expected...
Links:
Forum for this podcast: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Counselling with Roger Butler: counselling.curiouscreatures.biz
Off The Cuffs podcast: www.offthecuffs.org
Curious Creatures' Pre-recorded Workshops: www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm being interviewed by the crew from Off The Cuffs, which is a podcast with a focus on bdsm and the lifestyle around it.
These folks are funny - I like them. Their names are Dick-Wound, Minimus Maximus, and Lexual Romance. The conversation covers one of my favorite kinks - bum-drumming, kinky scenes as a form of creative expression, the nuances of using safe-words, and a bit about Curiosity, the sexuality event I run.
They've got a pretty casual, conversational style, and we start straight in, without any warmup. They've just asked me to talk about a time when things haven't gone as expected...
Links:
Forum for this podcast: forum.curiouscreatures.biz
Counselling with Roger Butler: counselling.curiouscreatures.biz
Off The Cuffs podcast: www.offthecuffs.org
Curious Creatures' Pre-recorded Workshops: www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Ep 63: Re-ep 43 Kissing with Isiah McKimmie
Today, we’re listening back to one of our most popular - and adventurous - episodes from early 2019: Kissing.
What do you like, and not like, about kissing?
How good are you at training a new person in how to kiss you?
More importantly, how do you feel about training this person that’s in front of you, right now, in how to kiss you?
They’re the questions Rog (from Curious Creatures) and Isiah McKimmie front up to for you, in this episode. It’s an intro to kissing like you’ve never heard.
Isiah is a sex-therapist, relationship counsellor, and sexologist, who can be found at www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Rog, and Curious Creatures, are at www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Today, we’re listening back to one of our most popular - and adventurous - episodes from early 2019: Kissing.
What do you like, and not like, about kissing?
How good are you at training a new person in how to kiss you?
More importantly, how do you feel about training this person that’s in front of you, right now, in how to kiss you?
They’re the questions Rog (from Curious Creatures) and Isiah McKimmie front up to for you, in this episode. It’s an intro to kissing like you’ve never heard.
Isiah is a sex-therapist, relationship counsellor, and sexologist, who can be found at www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Rog, and Curious Creatures, are at www.curiouscreatures.biz.
Click here to listen!
Ep 62: How shame gets inside you and your relationships, and how to get it out - with Georgie Wolf
Today, I'm having a spirited conversation with Georgie Wolf. You've heard her on the show before, because she's 68 different kinds of awesome.
When I say, "I'm having a conversation with Georgie", what I actually mean, is, "Georgie is having a conversation with me". She recorded this for her podcast, which is called the Art of the Hookup - more about that at the end of the show.
We started out with the topic of shame, as in, the shame that goes on in relation to sex and sexuality. Here's the thing - if you think this topic doesn't apply to you, you're almost certainly wrong. Shame is almost everywhere, and it becomes an embedded part of all of our sexualities - we internalise the shame.
It influences how we approach other people, how they approach us, how we relate to our bodies and our pleasure, and it has implications for our mental health. It's got huge implications, too, for our relationships. But this chat is anything but doom-and-gloom; there's as much here about solutions as there is about the problem itself.
So buckle up, get a cup of tea, and listen to Georgie and I getting really excited about shame...
Links mentioned in episode:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Curious Creatures (including online & pre-recorded workshops) - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Counselling with Roger Butler - counselling.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm having a spirited conversation with Georgie Wolf. You've heard her on the show before, because she's 68 different kinds of awesome.
When I say, "I'm having a conversation with Georgie", what I actually mean, is, "Georgie is having a conversation with me". She recorded this for her podcast, which is called the Art of the Hookup - more about that at the end of the show.
We started out with the topic of shame, as in, the shame that goes on in relation to sex and sexuality. Here's the thing - if you think this topic doesn't apply to you, you're almost certainly wrong. Shame is almost everywhere, and it becomes an embedded part of all of our sexualities - we internalise the shame.
It influences how we approach other people, how they approach us, how we relate to our bodies and our pleasure, and it has implications for our mental health. It's got huge implications, too, for our relationships. But this chat is anything but doom-and-gloom; there's as much here about solutions as there is about the problem itself.
So buckle up, get a cup of tea, and listen to Georgie and I getting really excited about shame...
Links mentioned in episode:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Curious Creatures (including online & pre-recorded workshops) - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Counselling with Roger Butler - counselling.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 61: Relationship Agreements: Tight, or Loose? ( Re- Ep 22)
We've been getting a few questions lately about agreements in polyamory - and since it's a topic we covered way back in 2017, today we'll be listening back to that episode.
With Rog are two sex educators and polyamory specialists, Anne Hunter and Dossie Easton. You should definitely check out Dossie's book, 'The Ethical Slut', which is something of a bible when it comes to exploring non-monogamy.
Also, you'll want to check out Curious Creatures' workshop, Opening Up To Opening Up, which is available online as well as in-person when the pandemic sorts itself out.
We'll also have a pre-recorded, 'view anytime' version available soon.
Opening Up To Opening Up workshop: www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up-online
The Ethical Slut book: www.dossieeaston.com/books.html
Dossie Easton: www.dossieeaston.com
Anne Hunter: www.annehunter.com.au
Click here to listen!
We've been getting a few questions lately about agreements in polyamory - and since it's a topic we covered way back in 2017, today we'll be listening back to that episode.
With Rog are two sex educators and polyamory specialists, Anne Hunter and Dossie Easton. You should definitely check out Dossie's book, 'The Ethical Slut', which is something of a bible when it comes to exploring non-monogamy.
Also, you'll want to check out Curious Creatures' workshop, Opening Up To Opening Up, which is available online as well as in-person when the pandemic sorts itself out.
We'll also have a pre-recorded, 'view anytime' version available soon.
Opening Up To Opening Up workshop: www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up-online
The Ethical Slut book: www.dossieeaston.com/books.html
Dossie Easton: www.dossieeaston.com
Anne Hunter: www.annehunter.com.au
Click here to listen!
Ep 60: Four Sex Educators Walks Into A Bar -Part 2
Today, I'm finally doing something I've been wanting to do for ages.
If you've ever been to one of our in-person or online Socials, you'll already be familiar with what I call Q&A, where one person asks a question, then each person takes turns to answer.
We're about to do that here, with four sex educators, who become both interviewers and interviewees. Cool, huh?
Guests:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Tamica Wilder - somatic sex educator - Facebook www.facebook.com/neosomasexcoach
Tess - Occupational Therapist specialising in sexuality - www.connectabletherapies.com
Rog - Curious Creatures - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm finally doing something I've been wanting to do for ages.
If you've ever been to one of our in-person or online Socials, you'll already be familiar with what I call Q&A, where one person asks a question, then each person takes turns to answer.
We're about to do that here, with four sex educators, who become both interviewers and interviewees. Cool, huh?
Guests:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Tamica Wilder - somatic sex educator - Facebook www.facebook.com/neosomasexcoach
Tess - Occupational Therapist specialising in sexuality - www.connectabletherapies.com
Rog - Curious Creatures - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 59: Four Sex Educators Walks Into A Bar -Part 1
Today, I'm finally doing something I've been wanting to do for ages.
If you've ever been to one of our in-person or online Socials, you'll already be familiar with what I call Q&A, where one person asks a question, then each person takes turns to answer.
We're about to do that here, with four sex educators, who become both interviewers and interviewees. Cool, huh?
Guests:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Tamica Wilder - somatic sex educator - Facebook www.facebook.com/neosomasexcoach
Tess - Occupational Therapist specialising in sexuality - www.connectabletherapies.com
Rog - Curious Creatures - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm finally doing something I've been wanting to do for ages.
If you've ever been to one of our in-person or online Socials, you'll already be familiar with what I call Q&A, where one person asks a question, then each person takes turns to answer.
We're about to do that here, with four sex educators, who become both interviewers and interviewees. Cool, huh?
Guests:
Georgie Wolf - The Art of the Hookup - www.artofthehookup.com
Tamica Wilder - somatic sex educator - Facebook www.facebook.com/neosomasexcoach
Tess - Occupational Therapist specialising in sexuality - www.connectabletherapies.com
Rog - Curious Creatures - www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 58 (Re 24): How to become a dom (dominant)
Today, we're listening back to an episode from 2017, where a listener asks for advice on how to become a dom. For those of you not in the kink scene, the word 'dom' is short for dominant, which is actually surprisingly hard to define, but you might say: The dominant is the person that's steering, or perhaps controlling, the play. But that's actually not entirely accurate, because what happens between two people should be defined by the two of them; it's not like the dom can just do what they want.
Anyway, let's handball over to my guests to get into the detail. My first guest is BJ, from Eagle Leather, which is a great fetish-oriented retail outlet in Melbourne. I've gotten a lot of great gear from them over the years, and I warmly recommend them.
My second guest is Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who teach ropes and related skills, also in Melbourne. Links to both are in the show notes.
Eagle Leather: www.eagleleather.com.au
Blue Velvet Arts: www.bluevelvetarts.com
Click here to listen!
Today, we're listening back to an episode from 2017, where a listener asks for advice on how to become a dom. For those of you not in the kink scene, the word 'dom' is short for dominant, which is actually surprisingly hard to define, but you might say: The dominant is the person that's steering, or perhaps controlling, the play. But that's actually not entirely accurate, because what happens between two people should be defined by the two of them; it's not like the dom can just do what they want.
Anyway, let's handball over to my guests to get into the detail. My first guest is BJ, from Eagle Leather, which is a great fetish-oriented retail outlet in Melbourne. I've gotten a lot of great gear from them over the years, and I warmly recommend them.
My second guest is Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who teach ropes and related skills, also in Melbourne. Links to both are in the show notes.
Eagle Leather: www.eagleleather.com.au
Blue Velvet Arts: www.bluevelvetarts.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 57: Polyamory, working on your stuff, and learning from relationships.
Rog and Tess, from Curious Creatures, are interviewed about all sorts of relationship things including - but not limited to - polyamory.
Links that were mentioned...
Tess, Connectable Therapies: www.connectabletherapies.com
Joy FM radio station: joy.org.au
Triple bi-pass show / podcast: joy.org.au/triplebipass
PolyVic: polyvic.herokuapp.com
Workshop 'Opening Up To Opening Up': www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up.html
Curious Creatures mailing list: www.curiouscreatures.biz/contact.html
Click here to listen!
Rog and Tess, from Curious Creatures, are interviewed about all sorts of relationship things including - but not limited to - polyamory.
Links that were mentioned...
Tess, Connectable Therapies: www.connectabletherapies.com
Joy FM radio station: joy.org.au
Triple bi-pass show / podcast: joy.org.au/triplebipass
PolyVic: polyvic.herokuapp.com
Workshop 'Opening Up To Opening Up': www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up.html
Curious Creatures mailing list: www.curiouscreatures.biz/contact.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 56: Social connection during isolation, The Weekly Service.
We start by talking a little about a potential solution to the problem of social isolation.
Then, we move into a talk that Rog gave at The Weekly Service, on how Curious Creatures came into being, the Consent Cards, Ethics and advertising, sex and capitalism, deep-dive into consent in practice, faking orgasms, higher and lower libido).
The Online Socials can be found at www.curiouscreatures.biz/online-social.html
Curious Creatures are at www.curiouscreatures.biz
The Weekly Service is at theweeklyservice.org
Our workshop 'Fun Little Sex Games' is at www.curiouscreatures.biz/fun-little-sex-games1.html
And our workshop 'Pathways to your Pleasure' is at www.curiouscreatures.biz/pathways-to-your-pleasure.html
Our Consent Cards can be found at www.consentcard.com
Click here to listen!
We start by talking a little about a potential solution to the problem of social isolation.
Then, we move into a talk that Rog gave at The Weekly Service, on how Curious Creatures came into being, the Consent Cards, Ethics and advertising, sex and capitalism, deep-dive into consent in practice, faking orgasms, higher and lower libido).
The Online Socials can be found at www.curiouscreatures.biz/online-social.html
Curious Creatures are at www.curiouscreatures.biz
The Weekly Service is at theweeklyservice.org
Our workshop 'Fun Little Sex Games' is at www.curiouscreatures.biz/fun-little-sex-games1.html
And our workshop 'Pathways to your Pleasure' is at www.curiouscreatures.biz/pathways-to-your-pleasure.html
Our Consent Cards can be found at www.consentcard.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 55: Let's have fun defining your gender. Plus, an inner- work exercise.
Today's topic, is about gender, and your gender identity. Welcome to one of the most confusing, and consistently misunderstood topics... in the world.
We're going to walk through a structure - a way of thinking about gender identity - that will likely help with your understanding of yourself, and also those around you.
Today's episode is by Rog, from Curious Creatures: curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Today's topic, is about gender, and your gender identity. Welcome to one of the most confusing, and consistently misunderstood topics... in the world.
We're going to walk through a structure - a way of thinking about gender identity - that will likely help with your understanding of yourself, and also those around you.
Today's episode is by Rog, from Curious Creatures: curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 54: Re-ep: Number One Sex Move
Today, we're listening again to an episode from early 2017, responding to the question of "What's your number one sex move?".
To tackle this, I'm chatting with Maureen Matthews, and Cath Carter. Maureen writes a column in the Sunday Age, called 'About Last Night'. And Cath, up until her death earlier this year, was a counselor and central figure in Australia's sex-positive community. I miss her, and her contributions to the world.
Anyway... Join us for a chat about our number one sex moves.
Click here to listen!
Today, we're listening again to an episode from early 2017, responding to the question of "What's your number one sex move?".
To tackle this, I'm chatting with Maureen Matthews, and Cath Carter. Maureen writes a column in the Sunday Age, called 'About Last Night'. And Cath, up until her death earlier this year, was a counselor and central figure in Australia's sex-positive community. I miss her, and her contributions to the world.
Anyway... Join us for a chat about our number one sex moves.
Click here to listen!
Ep 53: Modern relationship dynamics, sex education, affairs, and football comparisons.
Today, we’re chatting with Myola Woods, who’s a sexuality specialist from Sydney, Australia. She’ll be in Melbourne from Feb 26-29, presenting five workshops, all of which you can find at curiouscreatures.biz.
Myola can be found at www.eroticcoaching.com.au
Click here to listen!
Today, we’re chatting with Myola Woods, who’s a sexuality specialist from Sydney, Australia. She’ll be in Melbourne from Feb 26-29, presenting five workshops, all of which you can find at curiouscreatures.biz.
Myola can be found at www.eroticcoaching.com.au
Click here to listen!
Ep 52: Georgie Wolf: Which gender(s) have it easier in the dating game?
Today, I'm going to share with you an episode of Georgie Wolf's podcast, where she interviews me on the slightly vexed question of who's got it easier in the pickup game; men, or women. It's a wide-ranging, interesting, and juicy conversation.
Georgie's podcast is called The Art of the Hookup, which relates to a a book she's written of the same name. It's an awesome book on, as the title would suggest, hooking up, but it goes further into just being a great sex-positive primer, and includes a bunch of stuff on how to be a good person, essentially.
Georgie Wolf can be found at www.artofthehookup.com
Click here to listen!
Today, I'm going to share with you an episode of Georgie Wolf's podcast, where she interviews me on the slightly vexed question of who's got it easier in the pickup game; men, or women. It's a wide-ranging, interesting, and juicy conversation.
Georgie's podcast is called The Art of the Hookup, which relates to a a book she's written of the same name. It's an awesome book on, as the title would suggest, hooking up, but it goes further into just being a great sex-positive primer, and includes a bunch of stuff on how to be a good person, essentially.
Georgie Wolf can be found at www.artofthehookup.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 51: Jessica Drake: Solving the world's problems, one porno at a time
Today, we're chatting with Jessica Drake.
Jessica's big in the world of porn and sex-work, which, along with her own life story, has given her some fascinating perspectives on sex and sex education.
We get into all sorts of details about the difference between entertainment porn and education porn, and how a lack of proper sex education leads people to porn, which we then blame for not being educational.
Jessica's authority to speak to the topic comes from about 20 years in the game, at every level - from rank amateur, then as a seasoned performer, and then as a producer. Recently she's been doing some great work around producing educational material and other forms of outreach, and she's also one of the people that spoke out about the way she was treated by Donald Trump.
We caught up when she was in Melbourne recently for Sexpo; join us for a conversation about sex.
Jessica Drake's pleasure guides can be found at: https://www.guidetowickedsex.com/
Twitter @thejessicadrake
Insta jessicadrake
Click here to listen!
Today, we're chatting with Jessica Drake.
Jessica's big in the world of porn and sex-work, which, along with her own life story, has given her some fascinating perspectives on sex and sex education.
We get into all sorts of details about the difference between entertainment porn and education porn, and how a lack of proper sex education leads people to porn, which we then blame for not being educational.
Jessica's authority to speak to the topic comes from about 20 years in the game, at every level - from rank amateur, then as a seasoned performer, and then as a producer. Recently she's been doing some great work around producing educational material and other forms of outreach, and she's also one of the people that spoke out about the way she was treated by Donald Trump.
We caught up when she was in Melbourne recently for Sexpo; join us for a conversation about sex.
Jessica Drake's pleasure guides can be found at: https://www.guidetowickedsex.com/
Twitter @thejessicadrake
Insta jessicadrake
Click here to listen!
Ep 50: Tips for What's it like to host Australia's daggiest sex-party?
You might recall, back at the end of 2018, we did an episode called ‘secrets from inside a sex-party community’. It was all about what it’s like to attend an event I run called Curiosity, which is hard to describe… But essentially, I guess it fits in the category of ‘sex party’. That episode was told from the perspective of the participants, and I thought it might be fun to have a chat with the hosts, too. So that’s what we’re doing today.
This interview features Linda Kirkman, who you’ve heard on the show before. Linda is a counsellor for singles and couples, with a specialty in diversity and sexuality – which you’ll have worked out for yourself, by the end of this episode. You can find Linda at http://lindakirkman.org/ .
Linda’s based in Bendigo, Australia, but offers video sessions to anyone. She’s across all the quote-unquote ‘lifestyle choices’ that tend to make people reluctant to seek psychological or emotional assistance.
And the second host is Tess, who is also an Occupational Therapist. They run Connectable Therapies, which helps people with sexual development and rehabilitation. Check them out at https://www.connectabletherapies.com/ .
Click here to listen!
You might recall, back at the end of 2018, we did an episode called ‘secrets from inside a sex-party community’. It was all about what it’s like to attend an event I run called Curiosity, which is hard to describe… But essentially, I guess it fits in the category of ‘sex party’. That episode was told from the perspective of the participants, and I thought it might be fun to have a chat with the hosts, too. So that’s what we’re doing today.
This interview features Linda Kirkman, who you’ve heard on the show before. Linda is a counsellor for singles and couples, with a specialty in diversity and sexuality – which you’ll have worked out for yourself, by the end of this episode. You can find Linda at http://lindakirkman.org/ .
Linda’s based in Bendigo, Australia, but offers video sessions to anyone. She’s across all the quote-unquote ‘lifestyle choices’ that tend to make people reluctant to seek psychological or emotional assistance.
And the second host is Tess, who is also an Occupational Therapist. They run Connectable Therapies, which helps people with sexual development and rehabilitation. Check them out at https://www.connectabletherapies.com/ .
Click here to listen!
Ep 49: Tips for all of us on rebuilding trust and intimacy
This episode is all about how to recover and restore trust, when there’s been some form of relationship abuse in the past. When we first aired this conversation, in 2017, a number of people asked for specific and practical things that they could do with a partner or client who’s in the process of recovering.
So, after the conversation, I’ll share with you six very specific things you can do.
Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz) is joined by sex-therapists Anne Hunter (annehunter.com.au) and Niyati Evers (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
This episode is all about how to recover and restore trust, when there’s been some form of relationship abuse in the past. When we first aired this conversation, in 2017, a number of people asked for specific and practical things that they could do with a partner or client who’s in the process of recovering.
So, after the conversation, I’ll share with you six very specific things you can do.
Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz) is joined by sex-therapists Anne Hunter (annehunter.com.au) and Niyati Evers (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 48: How to get the most out of sex-work, by two sex-workers.
Today, come and join Georgie Wolf and Rog (from Curious Creatures) on the couch for an intimate and honest chat about sex-work.
Links relevant to the show:
Georgie Wolf's book, The Art of the Hookup, is at https://www.artofthehookup.com/about-the-book/.
Their client coaching services are at https://www.georgiewolf.com/escort-client-coaching-sessions/.
Tess's and Rog's non-monogamy workshop, Opening Up To Opening Up: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up.html
Curiously Social Creatures: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/curiously-social-creatures1.html
Playing With Your Power: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/playing-with-your-rank--power.html
Dr Martha Lee's Melbourne November workshops: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/martha_lee_workshops.html
Click here to listen!
Today, come and join Georgie Wolf and Rog (from Curious Creatures) on the couch for an intimate and honest chat about sex-work.
Links relevant to the show:
Georgie Wolf's book, The Art of the Hookup, is at https://www.artofthehookup.com/about-the-book/.
Their client coaching services are at https://www.georgiewolf.com/escort-client-coaching-sessions/.
Tess's and Rog's non-monogamy workshop, Opening Up To Opening Up: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/opening-up-to-opening-up.html
Curiously Social Creatures: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/curiously-social-creatures1.html
Playing With Your Power: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/playing-with-your-rank--power.html
Dr Martha Lee's Melbourne November workshops: https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/martha_lee_workshops.html
Click here to listen!
Ep 47: F___you, rapist.
Rog, from Curious Creatures https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/, presents a spoken-word piece about the ongoing effects and impacts of things that happened a long time ago. As well as some more current-day dilemmas.
Click here to listen!
Rog, from Curious Creatures https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/, presents a spoken-word piece about the ongoing effects and impacts of things that happened a long time ago. As well as some more current-day dilemmas.
Click here to listen!
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Ep 46: Are you addicted to sex? What about footy? (replay)
This is one of the great myths about sex - that our sexuality is essentially a wild, out of control beast waiting to consume us whole, the moment we let it off its leash. We have been taught, from so many places, to keep it locked down and not explore our interests.
Which begs a follow-up question: Why is our interest in sex so very different to our interest in - for example - football? Or anything else?
To answer this question, interviews with two people - one of them interested in sex, the other in football - are compared and contrasted in a way that illuminates just what a sex-negative (and, perhaps, a football-positive) world we live in. Prepare to be entertained, as Curious Creatures takes a few steps away from the usual 'Curious Conversations About Sex' format.
This episode is brought to you by Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz), and friends.
If you are seeking support in relation to your own potential sex addiction, in Australia you might want to start with Lifeline (13 11 14), or the counselors on the Curious Creatures ‘other recommended resources’ page.
Click here to listen!
This is one of the great myths about sex - that our sexuality is essentially a wild, out of control beast waiting to consume us whole, the moment we let it off its leash. We have been taught, from so many places, to keep it locked down and not explore our interests.
Which begs a follow-up question: Why is our interest in sex so very different to our interest in - for example - football? Or anything else?
To answer this question, interviews with two people - one of them interested in sex, the other in football - are compared and contrasted in a way that illuminates just what a sex-negative (and, perhaps, a football-positive) world we live in. Prepare to be entertained, as Curious Creatures takes a few steps away from the usual 'Curious Conversations About Sex' format.
This episode is brought to you by Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz), and friends.
If you are seeking support in relation to your own potential sex addiction, in Australia you might want to start with Lifeline (13 11 14), or the counselors on the Curious Creatures ‘other recommended resources’ page.
Click here to listen!
Ep 45: Hope In An Often Hopeless Realm: Restorative Justice (part two of two)
Today, we’re looking into Restorative Justice again; this is the second in a two-part series, and I hate to do this to you, but I need you to go back and listen to the previous episode, if you haven’t already. Seriously, a bunch of stuff in the following episode won’t make sense, and I’m worried about how some things might sound out of context. It’ll be worth it, because this is a really juicy topic.
Rog, from Curious Creatures www.curiouscreatures.biz, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
– Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore’s vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA, en route to the University of San Diego. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.campusprism.org.
Click here to listen!
Today, we’re looking into Restorative Justice again; this is the second in a two-part series, and I hate to do this to you, but I need you to go back and listen to the previous episode, if you haven’t already. Seriously, a bunch of stuff in the following episode won’t make sense, and I’m worried about how some things might sound out of context. It’ll be worth it, because this is a really juicy topic.
Rog, from Curious Creatures www.curiouscreatures.biz, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
– Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore’s vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA, en route to the University of San Diego. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.campusprism.org.
Click here to listen!
Ep 44: Hope In An Often Hopeless Realm: Restorative Justice (part one of two)
Today, we’re talking about one of the only sources of hope, in an area most of us generally feel pretty hopeless about.
When sexual assault occurs, it often changes the lives of the people that are directly involved, and also those around them. It’s like a pivotal event, a moment in time, that patterns everything that comes afterwards, and the thing that’s so hopeless about it is that there seems to be so little in the way of anything resembling a positive outcome, for anyone.
Restorative Justice is a form of mediation where the fundamental idea is that the people that were involved in an incident, actually sit down and try and work out what justice might look like.
Rog, from Curious Creatures https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
- Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at https://projectrestore.nz/.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA, en route to the University of San Diego. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at https://www.campusprism.org.
Click here to listen!
Today, we’re talking about one of the only sources of hope, in an area most of us generally feel pretty hopeless about.
When sexual assault occurs, it often changes the lives of the people that are directly involved, and also those around them. It’s like a pivotal event, a moment in time, that patterns everything that comes afterwards, and the thing that’s so hopeless about it is that there seems to be so little in the way of anything resembling a positive outcome, for anyone.
Restorative Justice is a form of mediation where the fundamental idea is that the people that were involved in an incident, actually sit down and try and work out what justice might look like.
Rog, from Curious Creatures https://www.curiouscreatures.biz/, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
- Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore's vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at https://projectrestore.nz/.
- David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA, en route to the University of San Diego. He's been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at https://www.campusprism.org.
Click here to listen!
Ep 43: Kissing with Isiah Mckimmie (Fixed)
What do you like, and not like, about kissing?
How good are you at training a new person in how to kiss you?
More importantly, how do you feel about training this person that’s in front of you, right now, in how to kiss you?
They’re the questions Rog (from Curious Creatures) and Isiah McKimmie front up to for you, in this episode. It’s an intro to kissing like you’ve never heard.
Isiah is a sex-therapist, relationship counsellor, and sexologist, who can be found at www.isiah-mckimmie.com/
Click here to listen!
What do you like, and not like, about kissing?
How good are you at training a new person in how to kiss you?
More importantly, how do you feel about training this person that’s in front of you, right now, in how to kiss you?
They’re the questions Rog (from Curious Creatures) and Isiah McKimmie front up to for you, in this episode. It’s an intro to kissing like you’ve never heard.
Isiah is a sex-therapist, relationship counsellor, and sexologist, who can be found at www.isiah-mckimmie.com/
Click here to listen!
Ep 42: How To Have More Interesting Sex (Replay)
Today, we're having another listen to a conversation with two of the world's best sex educators and prioneers, about how to introduce more interesting sex into a relationship.
My first guest is Cyndi Darnell, who is an educator and counsellor based in New York. She's available for sessions via video conferencing.
My second guest is Barbara Carellas, also a sex educator and pioneer, and offering workshops around the world. Among many other achievements, Barbara wrote the book 'Urban Tantra', which I warmly recommend; it certainly shaped a lot of my journey.
Cyndi Darnell can be found at https://www.cyndidarnell.com/.
Barbara Carellas is at https://barbaracarrellas.com/.
Click here to listen!
Today, we're having another listen to a conversation with two of the world's best sex educators and prioneers, about how to introduce more interesting sex into a relationship.
My first guest is Cyndi Darnell, who is an educator and counsellor based in New York. She's available for sessions via video conferencing.
My second guest is Barbara Carellas, also a sex educator and pioneer, and offering workshops around the world. Among many other achievements, Barbara wrote the book 'Urban Tantra', which I warmly recommend; it certainly shaped a lot of my journey.
Cyndi Darnell can be found at https://www.cyndidarnell.com/.
Barbara Carellas is at https://barbaracarrellas.com/.
Click here to listen!
Ep 41: The Art of the Hookup
Is there an art to the act of the hookup? Is it about more than the right outfit, the right opening line, and a bucket of fuck-luck? And what's all this talk about self-development, and solutions to the world's problems?
On this episode, Rog (from Curious Creatures) interviews Georgie Wolf, author of a book called 'The Art of the Hook-up'. It's a radical read, and it's got the potential to really positively influence the way the dating game plays out - also sex, and relationships, more generally.
Stay tuned at the end, for responses to listener feedback.
Georgie Wolf can be found at www.artofthehookup.com.
Click here to listen!
Is there an art to the act of the hookup? Is it about more than the right outfit, the right opening line, and a bucket of fuck-luck? And what's all this talk about self-development, and solutions to the world's problems?
On this episode, Rog (from Curious Creatures) interviews Georgie Wolf, author of a book called 'The Art of the Hook-up'. It's a radical read, and it's got the potential to really positively influence the way the dating game plays out - also sex, and relationships, more generally.
Stay tuned at the end, for responses to listener feedback.
Georgie Wolf can be found at www.artofthehookup.com.
Click here to listen!
Ep 40: Curiosity - secrets from inside a sex-party community
I get asked a lot of questions about what it’s like to go to a sex-party, and in particular, the one I run, called Curiosity.
So to answer your questions, I interviewed four regular Curiosity participants about their experiences, and they offer you a very candid and honest perspective into the little world of sex and self-development they find themselves in; this is like no story on what it's like to be at a sex-party that you'll have ever have heard.
You can find Curiosity, the play-party (and workshop, etc.) at curiosity.curiouscreatures.biz
This podcast is brought to you by www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
I get asked a lot of questions about what it’s like to go to a sex-party, and in particular, the one I run, called Curiosity.
So to answer your questions, I interviewed four regular Curiosity participants about their experiences, and they offer you a very candid and honest perspective into the little world of sex and self-development they find themselves in; this is like no story on what it's like to be at a sex-party that you'll have ever have heard.
You can find Curiosity, the play-party (and workshop, etc.) at curiosity.curiouscreatures.biz
This podcast is brought to you by www.curiouscreatures.biz
Click here to listen!
Ep 39: What do you wish you were told before entering the sex industry?
Today, Seani Love, award winning sex-worker and sex educator, is back with us. The question we're tackling gets us into all sorts of interesting spots, such as the process of undoing gender conditioning and socialisation, removing the link between being attractive and being sexy, and a few reflections on the nature of the industry. And life.
You can find Seani at www.seanilove.com. And for those of you near Melbourne, Australia, Seani's running a 7-day retreat on sex magick at the start of January.
Click here to listen!
Today, Seani Love, award winning sex-worker and sex educator, is back with us. The question we're tackling gets us into all sorts of interesting spots, such as the process of undoing gender conditioning and socialisation, removing the link between being attractive and being sexy, and a few reflections on the nature of the industry. And life.
You can find Seani at www.seanilove.com. And for those of you near Melbourne, Australia, Seani's running a 7-day retreat on sex magick at the start of January.
Click here to listen!
Ep 38: Sex and intimacy during and after pregnancy
This show’s for pretty much anyone that’s been in a long-term relationship, and had to tackle any of the sex-life challenges that life throws up. Such as busy work lives, health issues, or pregnancy and early parenthood. Focussing on the latter, this episode is all about navigating our often fickle sex lives while preparing for and dealing with a new child on the scene.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, interviews Erika Munton, a birth and relationships coach, in Melbourne, Australia. Erika can be found at birthready.com.au.
Click here to listen!
This show’s for pretty much anyone that’s been in a long-term relationship, and had to tackle any of the sex-life challenges that life throws up. Such as busy work lives, health issues, or pregnancy and early parenthood. Focussing on the latter, this episode is all about navigating our often fickle sex lives while preparing for and dealing with a new child on the scene.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, interviews Erika Munton, a birth and relationships coach, in Melbourne, Australia. Erika can be found at birthready.com.au.
Click here to listen!
Ep 37: Oral Sex
Today, we're switching! Rog (from Curious Creatures) is being interviewed by someone else. Well, sort of; there's a bit of topping from the bottom going on. Oops.
You may remember Isiah McKimmie from a few episodes back; they chatted about safer sex. It was such fun, that they wanted to interview me about oral sex for their podcast, Love, Sex, and Intimacy (linked to in the show-notes). And we're now listening to that conversation, here.
We started with Isiah trying to work out whether they actually like oral sex or not...
Isiah’s podcast: https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com/blog-pod/
Click here to listen!
Today, we're switching! Rog (from Curious Creatures) is being interviewed by someone else. Well, sort of; there's a bit of topping from the bottom going on. Oops.
You may remember Isiah McKimmie from a few episodes back; they chatted about safer sex. It was such fun, that they wanted to interview me about oral sex for their podcast, Love, Sex, and Intimacy (linked to in the show-notes). And we're now listening to that conversation, here.
We started with Isiah trying to work out whether they actually like oral sex or not...
Isiah’s podcast: https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com/blog-pod/
Click here to listen!
Ep 36: As a 'top', how do you recover when things don't go as planned?
What a ripper of a question today. Big thanks to Greg for hitting us up with this one.
To answer it, I'm back with Seani Love, an award-winning sex-worker and workshop facilitator. The conversation comes across like you've walked in on a couple of kinky therapists having a chat, which is precisely what it is - a nuanced deep-dive into exactly what emotional safety looks like in practice, from a couple of folks that have made mistakes and learned from them. Seani's actually back in Melbourne in late June 2018, by the way, check out their website at www.seanilove.com.
Click here to listen!
What a ripper of a question today. Big thanks to Greg for hitting us up with this one.
To answer it, I'm back with Seani Love, an award-winning sex-worker and workshop facilitator. The conversation comes across like you've walked in on a couple of kinky therapists having a chat, which is precisely what it is - a nuanced deep-dive into exactly what emotional safety looks like in practice, from a couple of folks that have made mistakes and learned from them. Seani's actually back in Melbourne in late June 2018, by the way, check out their website at www.seanilove.com.
Click here to listen!
Ep 35: What's this language, of ' cock-owners' and 'vulva-owners'? (Part 2 of 2)
Today, we've got the second part of a conversation with Lee Harrington and Euphemia Rustle about all sorts of things to do with gender. And in particular, how we can all get along more, regardless of how long we've been immersed in gender-diverse thinking. We're pretty much just going to drop you in in the middle of the conversation. But hey, you're a smart cookie; you'll work out what's going on.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by two awesome sexuality educators: Euphemia Rustle (www.iwishyouknew.net), and Lee Harrington (www.passionandsoul.com).
Click here to listen!
Today, we've got the second part of a conversation with Lee Harrington and Euphemia Rustle about all sorts of things to do with gender. And in particular, how we can all get along more, regardless of how long we've been immersed in gender-diverse thinking. We're pretty much just going to drop you in in the middle of the conversation. But hey, you're a smart cookie; you'll work out what's going on.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by two awesome sexuality educators: Euphemia Rustle (www.iwishyouknew.net), and Lee Harrington (www.passionandsoul.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 34: What's this language, of ' cock-owners' and 'vulva-owners'? (Part 1 of 2)
...From there, this conversation rolls into topics relating to trans and queer identities, how we as individuals cope with a world that doesn't always understand our identities, and how much things have evolved. All this, without creating the illusion that there's one simple answer to these questions, that we all agree on. Because there's not.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by two awesome sexuality educators: Euphemia Rustle www.iwishyouknew.net, and Lee Harrington www.passionandsoul.com.
Click here to listen!
...From there, this conversation rolls into topics relating to trans and queer identities, how we as individuals cope with a world that doesn't always understand our identities, and how much things have evolved. All this, without creating the illusion that there's one simple answer to these questions, that we all agree on. Because there's not.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by two awesome sexuality educators: Euphemia Rustle www.iwishyouknew.net, and Lee Harrington www.passionandsoul.com.
Click here to listen!
Ep 33: How is kinky sex, and role-play in particular, a therapeutic process?
In this adventurous conversation with sex-worker and workshop facilitator Seani Love, the conversations draws many parallels and connections between therapy and kink. This is a conversation deep in the details of how to use kink for liberation and empowerment in a way that probably isn't for everyone, but can do laps around 'talk therapy' when it is.
Seani can be found at www.seanilove.com.
Click here to listen!
In this adventurous conversation with sex-worker and workshop facilitator Seani Love, the conversations draws many parallels and connections between therapy and kink. This is a conversation deep in the details of how to use kink for liberation and empowerment in a way that probably isn't for everyone, but can do laps around 'talk therapy' when it is.
Seani can be found at www.seanilove.com.
Click here to listen!
Ep 32: Safer sex (and sex, generally) part 3 of 3
Today, we've got the third of a three-part conversation about safer sex. Issiah McKimmie and I continue chatting about the detailed pragmatics, as well as the broader communication and psychological issues. We start with dental dams, move onto safer sex strategies for kinky play, and finish on the role of shame in STI conversations.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
Today, we've got the third of a three-part conversation about safer sex. Issiah McKimmie and I continue chatting about the detailed pragmatics, as well as the broader communication and psychological issues. We start with dental dams, move onto safer sex strategies for kinky play, and finish on the role of shame in STI conversations.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 31: Safer sex (and sex, generally) part 2 of 3
This is the second of a three-part conversation I had with Issiah McKimmie. The last one was all about safer sex practices as they relate to kissing, manual stimulation, and oral sex. Now, we're going to dive right in to genital-genital contact, and also some tips on safer sex in kinky play. Bear in mind I'm cutting you in half way through a conversation, which is kind of like starting a porno after all the clothes are already off, but you'll work it out.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
This is the second of a three-part conversation I had with Issiah McKimmie. The last one was all about safer sex practices as they relate to kissing, manual stimulation, and oral sex. Now, we're going to dive right in to genital-genital contact, and also some tips on safer sex in kinky play. Bear in mind I'm cutting you in half way through a conversation, which is kind of like starting a porno after all the clothes are already off, but you'll work it out.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 30: Safer sex (and sex, generally) part 1 of 3
Today we've got the 1st of three parts of a conversation I had with Issiah McKimmie. It started out being about how to do safer sex, but, y'know how these things go... It pretty much just wound up being about sex and communication and a whole bunch of jokes as we got deeper into the material.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
Today we've got the 1st of three parts of a conversation I had with Issiah McKimmie. It started out being about how to do safer sex, but, y'know how these things go... It pretty much just wound up being about sex and communication and a whole bunch of jokes as we got deeper into the material.
Isiah can be found at https://www.isiah-mckimmie.com
Click here to listen!
Ep 29: Where's the line between taking responsibility for your own stuff, versus calling out bad behavior?
Wow. What could possibly go wrong with this sweet, simple little question?
This conversation takes in everything from the mundane (such as giving yourself three days after writing an email before clicking 'send') through to the profound (such as how the question inspires an existential crisis and pleas to Buddha).
Getting sometimes confused and humble, but also managing to find some very sensible theories and tangible ideas, are:
Rog, from Curious Creatures;
Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com);
and Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Wow. What could possibly go wrong with this sweet, simple little question?
This conversation takes in everything from the mundane (such as giving yourself three days after writing an email before clicking 'send') through to the profound (such as how the question inspires an existential crisis and pleas to Buddha).
Getting sometimes confused and humble, but also managing to find some very sensible theories and tangible ideas, are:
Rog, from Curious Creatures;
Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com);
and Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 28: The Consent Cards: A primer in great sex and consent! (Part 3 of 3)
In this episode (the final in a three-part series), Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
Click here to listen!
In this episode (the final in a three-part series), Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
- How are we doing?
- What’s our brief description of what we’re planning to do?
- Why is this play interesting to you / me?
- What kind of experience are you / am I after?
- Have you / I done this kind of play before, or something like it?
- Can we check in, mid-play, using the scale of 0-10 to guage how intense it’s going (where 3-4 is warmup, and 6-7 is sustainable play)?
- If everything goes well, what is our upper limit for intensity?
- Do we have safe-words in place (eg. ‘green’ = all good; ‘orange’ = approaching a limit; ‘red’ = complete stop, debrief, then play may or may not continue…)?
- Can we leave marks (such as bruises, teeth-marks, scratches)?
- Do you / I have any injuries, health conditions or other body limitations that might be relevant?
- Are there any parts of our bodies (such as genitals, bum, chest) that we don’t want to be involved?
- Who might be gaining pleasure from this; who is it for?
- Is this activity likely to be triggering?
- Are you sober (and, if not, how can we make that safer)?
- What are our safer-sex practices (in terms of STI transmission), and are there any other safety issues?
- Will we need to do specific things to care for each other, afterwards?
- Are you happy to proceed? (Check for congruence, question any uncertainty).
Click here to listen!
Ep 27: The Consent Cards: A primer in great sex and consent! (Part 2 of 3)
In this episode (second in three-part series), Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
Click here to listen!
In this episode (second in three-part series), Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
- How are we doing?
- What’s our brief description of what we’re planning to do?
- Why is this play interesting to you / me?
- What kind of experience are you / am I after?
- Have you / I done this kind of play before, or something like it?
- Can we check in, mid-play, using the scale of 0-10 to guage how intense it’s going (where 3-4 is warmup, and 6-7 is sustainable play)?
- If everything goes well, what is our upper limit for intensity?
- Do we have safe-words in place (eg. ‘green’ = all good; ‘orange’ = approaching a limit; ‘red’ = complete stop, debrief, then play may or may not continue…)?
- Can we leave marks (such as bruises, teeth-marks, scratches)?
- Do you / I have any injuries, health conditions or other body limitations that might be relevant?
- Are there any parts of our bodies (such as genitals, bum, chest) that we don’t want to be involved?
- Who might be gaining pleasure from this; who is it for?
- Is this activity likely to be triggering?
- Are you sober (and, if not, how can we make that safer)?
- What are our safer-sex practices (in terms of STI transmission), and are there any other safety issues?
- Will we need to do specific things to care for each other, afterwards?
- Are you happy to proceed? (Check for congruence, question any uncertainty).
Click here to listen!
Ep 26: The Consent Cards: A primer in great sex and consent! (Part 1 of 3)
In this episode, Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
Click here to listen!
In this episode, Aerie (from Blue Velvet Arts) and Rog (from Curious Creatures) go through the questions on the Curious Creatures Consent Cards in detail. New and old players alike will find plenty in the way of juicy perspectives and personal stories about lessons learned the hard way.
The questions, are:
- How are we doing?
- What’s our brief description of what we’re planning to do?
- Why is this play interesting to you / me?
- What kind of experience are you / am I after?
- Have you / I done this kind of play before, or something like it?
- Can we check in, mid-play, using the scale of 0-10 to guage how intense it’s going (where 3-4 is warmup, and 6-7 is sustainable play)?
- If everything goes well, what is our upper limit for intensity?
- Do we have safe-words in place (eg. ‘green’ = all good; ‘orange’ = approaching a limit; ‘red’ = complete stop, debrief, then play may or may not continue…)?
- Can we leave marks (such as bruises, teeth-marks, scratches)?
- Do you / I have any injuries, health conditions or other body limitations that might be relevant?
- Are there any parts of our bodies (such as genitals, bum, chest) that we don’t want to be involved?
- Who might be gaining pleasure from this; who is it for?
- Is this activity likely to be triggering?
- Are you sober (and, if not, how can we make that safer)?
- What are our safer-sex practices (in terms of STI transmission), and are there any other safety issues?
- Will we need to do specific things to care for each other, afterwards?
- Are you happy to proceed? (Check for congruence, question any uncertainty).
Click here to listen!
Ep 25: Consent is not sexy.
Discuss: Consent is not 'sexy'; consent is a human right. You either have it, or you don't, and saying it's sexy confuses the issues.
To discuss this topic,
Rog (from Curious Creatures) is joined by: Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com).
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Discuss: Consent is not 'sexy'; consent is a human right. You either have it, or you don't, and saying it's sexy confuses the issues.
To discuss this topic,
Rog (from Curious Creatures) is joined by: Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com).
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 24: How do I learn to be a dominant (BDSM/kink)?
Want to hear some really good, genuine, down-to-earth players talk about what they think makes for a good dominant? ...Tune in to this one folks, for some of the most smoothly delivered and honest appraisals of what power-play is all about.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Want to hear some really good, genuine, down-to-earth players talk about what they think makes for a good dominant? ...Tune in to this one folks, for some of the most smoothly delivered and honest appraisals of what power-play is all about.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Ep 23: What's your number one sex move?
What’s your number one sex move? Is it a little wriggle with your finger at the right time? Something you do with your tongue? Or something entirely psychological?
To answer this question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of ‘About Last Night’ in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
What’s your number one sex move? Is it a little wriggle with your finger at the right time? Something you do with your tongue? Or something entirely psychological?
To answer this question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of ‘About Last Night’ in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
Ep 22: Polyamory: Do you believe in tight or loose agreements? ...Strict rules, or relationship anarchy?
Getting deep into the subtleties of polyamory (and open-relationships and non-monogamy, generally), tune in to get the combined wisdom of 70 years of combined experience!
This conversation goes into the subtle ways we sometimes use agreements to control one another, or avoid facing what we don't want to see within ourselves. It also includes information on how to put specific agreements in place that are unique to your relationships and that support all the people in your constellation, and personal stories on how agreements tend to change over time.
Not polyamorous? Fear not! - There's a lot of information in here that's just as applicable to monogamous relationship agreements!
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com).
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Getting deep into the subtleties of polyamory (and open-relationships and non-monogamy, generally), tune in to get the combined wisdom of 70 years of combined experience!
This conversation goes into the subtle ways we sometimes use agreements to control one another, or avoid facing what we don't want to see within ourselves. It also includes information on how to put specific agreements in place that are unique to your relationships and that support all the people in your constellation, and personal stories on how agreements tend to change over time.
Not polyamorous? Fear not! - There's a lot of information in here that's just as applicable to monogamous relationship agreements!
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Dossie Easton - author of The Ethical Slut (and various other progressive sexuality books), and counselor and relationships coach based in San Fransisco (dossieeaston.com).
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 21: How do you train a submissive?
In a conversation including consent (for a change!), safety, techniques, and the psychology of the way different people learn, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by: Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia. Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
In a conversation including consent (for a change!), safety, techniques, and the psychology of the way different people learn, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by: Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia. Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Ep 20: What do you wish you were told at the start of your sex journey?
Does sex denial work well as sex education? Can you rely on what your schoolmates tell you in lieu of sex education?
When did you first learn about 'consent', and that some of what had been happening to you was 'non-consent'?
Was it embarrassing, when you realised that what you'd learned from porn was partly amazing, and partly a bum-steer? Was that a bit... awkward?
Let's have a really frank conversation about what it was like growing up and navigating your sex.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by Dr Linda Kirkman - one of Australia's foremost specialists in sexuality, and aging in particular. Linda is a counselor who you can see via Skype anywhere in the world, or locally in Victoria, Australia.
Click here to listen!
Does sex denial work well as sex education? Can you rely on what your schoolmates tell you in lieu of sex education?
When did you first learn about 'consent', and that some of what had been happening to you was 'non-consent'?
Was it embarrassing, when you realised that what you'd learned from porn was partly amazing, and partly a bum-steer? Was that a bit... awkward?
Let's have a really frank conversation about what it was like growing up and navigating your sex.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by Dr Linda Kirkman - one of Australia's foremost specialists in sexuality, and aging in particular. Linda is a counselor who you can see via Skype anywhere in the world, or locally in Victoria, Australia.
Click here to listen!
Ep 19: I have Vaginismus - any advice welcome.
What follows is a very special conversation about Vaginismus, from the very personal perspective of three people with direct experience of the condition. Their stories are at times focussed around practical solutions that have worked for them, but mostly the therapeutic and interpersonal nature of their experience. They're not claiming to be experts on the topic, however they are clearly experts regarding their own experiences.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
What follows is a very special conversation about Vaginismus, from the very personal perspective of three people with direct experience of the condition. Their stories are at times focussed around practical solutions that have worked for them, but mostly the therapeutic and interpersonal nature of their experience. They're not claiming to be experts on the topic, however they are clearly experts regarding their own experiences.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 18: Is sex a slippery slope of addiction? Does the pursuit of sex inevitably lead to...?
This is one of the great myths about sex - that our sexuality is essentially a wild, out of control beast waiting to consume us whole, the moment we let it off its leash. We have been taught, from so many places, to keep it locked down and not explore our interests.
Which begs a follow-up question: Why is our interest in sex so very different to our interest in - for example - football? Or anything else?
To answer this question, interviews with two people - one of them interested in sex, the other in football - are compared and contrasted in a way that illuminates just what a sex-negative (and, perhaps, a football-positive) world we live in. Prepare to be entertained, as Curious Creatures takes a few steps away from the usual 'Curious Conversations About Sex' format.
This episode is brought to you by Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz), and friends.
If you are seeking support in relation to your own potential sex addiction, in Australia you might want to start with Lifeline (13 11 14), or the counselors on the Curious Creatures resources page.
Click here to listen!
This is one of the great myths about sex - that our sexuality is essentially a wild, out of control beast waiting to consume us whole, the moment we let it off its leash. We have been taught, from so many places, to keep it locked down and not explore our interests.
Which begs a follow-up question: Why is our interest in sex so very different to our interest in - for example - football? Or anything else?
To answer this question, interviews with two people - one of them interested in sex, the other in football - are compared and contrasted in a way that illuminates just what a sex-negative (and, perhaps, a football-positive) world we live in. Prepare to be entertained, as Curious Creatures takes a few steps away from the usual 'Curious Conversations About Sex' format.
This episode is brought to you by Rog, from Curious Creatures (www.curiouscreatures.biz), and friends.
If you are seeking support in relation to your own potential sex addiction, in Australia you might want to start with Lifeline (13 11 14), or the counselors on the Curious Creatures resources page.
Click here to listen!
Ep 17: I notice my orgasm potential dropping off over time; what's sex like for aging people?
This conversation takes in aspects of sexuality that are important to everyone, but especially relevant to those of us that are aging (or planning to do so in the future). Topics range from body positivity, to theoretical constructs around sexuality, to beautifully frank and specific suggestions and strategies.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by Dr Linda Kirkman - one of Australia's foremost specialists in sexuality, and aging in particular. Linda is a counselor who you can see via Skype anywhere in the world, or locally in Victoria, Australia.
Click here to listen!
This conversation takes in aspects of sexuality that are important to everyone, but especially relevant to those of us that are aging (or planning to do so in the future). Topics range from body positivity, to theoretical constructs around sexuality, to beautifully frank and specific suggestions and strategies.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by Dr Linda Kirkman - one of Australia's foremost specialists in sexuality, and aging in particular. Linda is a counselor who you can see via Skype anywhere in the world, or locally in Victoria, Australia.
Click here to listen!
Ep 16: BDSM: Isn't it just more sexualised violence against woman?
Why is violence suddenly meant to be okay if someone's wearing a ball-gag? What's misogyny / misandry play? How does slut-shaming fit into all of this? And is this going to be another conversation ending in a discussion about consent?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Why is violence suddenly meant to be okay if someone's wearing a ball-gag? What's misogyny / misandry play? How does slut-shaming fit into all of this? And is this going to be another conversation ending in a discussion about consent?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Ep 15: My partner and I used to have sex...?
“My partner and I used to have sex, but not anymore, and I'm not even sure I want to, but I do still love them; any advice?” What happens to sex that started out so wonderfully, but then trails off into the distance? Does that pattern happen to everyone? Is the solution to accept the inevitable, or attempt to wrestle desire back onto the rails?
These questions and so many more are tackled by Rog, from Curious Creatures, along with:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
“My partner and I used to have sex, but not anymore, and I'm not even sure I want to, but I do still love them; any advice?” What happens to sex that started out so wonderfully, but then trails off into the distance? Does that pattern happen to everyone? Is the solution to accept the inevitable, or attempt to wrestle desire back onto the rails?
These questions and so many more are tackled by Rog, from Curious Creatures, along with:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 14: I hate my body...?
"I hate my body. I can't stand to have it seen naked with the lights on. How am I ever meant to have sex?"
To answer this most vulnerable of questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
"I hate my body. I can't stand to have it seen naked with the lights on. How am I ever meant to have sex?"
To answer this most vulnerable of questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
Ep 13: What's topping from the bottom?
The team deserves a gold star for just defining this complex issue!
What follows is loads of great advice about the subtleties of the interplay between a dominant and their submissive - or is a submissive, and their dominant?
This conversation scrolls through everything from bratty behavior to the possibility that submission is not appropriate because trust is not in place. Needless to say, communication and consent are mentioned many times!
For this nuanced little question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
The team deserves a gold star for just defining this complex issue!
What follows is loads of great advice about the subtleties of the interplay between a dominant and their submissive - or is a submissive, and their dominant?
This conversation scrolls through everything from bratty behavior to the possibility that submission is not appropriate because trust is not in place. Needless to say, communication and consent are mentioned many times!
For this nuanced little question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Aerie, from Blue Velvet Arts, who runs accessible and fun workshops on kink and communication in Melbourne, Australia.
Beejay, from Eagle Leather (in Abbotsford, Melbourne) - for all your fetish wear and equipment needs, and some great education / outreach also.
Click here to listen!
Ep 12: Is pursuing an interest in sex just about hedonism, or something more?
...Not that there's anything wrong with that! But yes, if you need it to be about more than simple hedonism, then we've got your back. It's about self-development, it's about relationship skills... It turns out, it's even about politics and war and peace.
To explain how, Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
...Not that there's anything wrong with that! But yes, if you need it to be about more than simple hedonism, then we've got your back. It's about self-development, it's about relationship skills... It turns out, it's even about politics and war and peace.
To explain how, Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Click here to listen!
Ep 11: Why are men such dicks?
Rog: "It was such a delight to tackle this very difficult question with Lorraine and Charlotte. Their perspective and insight and willingness to feel the humanity of the issues was relieving... special. The world is a better place for their understanding and willingness to engage".
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine's a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She's also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at www.charlottesway.net.
Click here to listen!
Rog: "It was such a delight to tackle this very difficult question with Lorraine and Charlotte. Their perspective and insight and willingness to feel the humanity of the issues was relieving... special. The world is a better place for their understanding and willingness to engage".
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine's a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She's also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at www.charlottesway.net.
Click here to listen!
Ep 10: What's it like being a public figure in the field of sexuality?
In a conversation that ranges through loneliness, privilege, group conflict, and having your sex acts taken out of context, this is one rollicking topic!
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
In a conversation that ranges through loneliness, privilege, group conflict, and having your sex acts taken out of context, this is one rollicking topic!
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
Ep 9: How do you learn to trust partners again, after abuse?
In this juicy episode, the topic of regaining trust after abuse is approached both theoretically, and with some very personal stories.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Additional resources:
- A follow-on article written by Niyati Evers, on how to create fulfilling relationships after experiences of abuse.
- A personal perspective on why relationships fail after abuse, and another on what male partners of female abuse survivors think.
Click here to listen!
In this juicy episode, the topic of regaining trust after abuse is approached both theoretically, and with some very personal stories.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Anne Hunter, a relationships coach and polyamory specialist, in Melbourne, Australia (yourrelationshiptoolbelt.com).
Niyati Evers, a psychotherapist and counsellor from Portland, Oregon (alchemy-of-eros.com).
Additional resources:
- A follow-on article written by Niyati Evers, on how to create fulfilling relationships after experiences of abuse.
- A personal perspective on why relationships fail after abuse, and another on what male partners of female abuse survivors think.
Click here to listen!
Ep 8: When your body doesn't behave as you'd like, including: How can I get my erection to last longer?
We all have bodies. We all have expectations on what we'd like from our bodies. And we all have to deal with the fact our bodies don't always do what we'd like.
Vaginas that aren't wet enough, or wide enough... Cocks that don't get hard, or that come too soon... Are they trying to tell us something? Are there specific things that we can do, or psychological things, to assist? Are there work-arounds?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
We all have bodies. We all have expectations on what we'd like from our bodies. And we all have to deal with the fact our bodies don't always do what we'd like.
Vaginas that aren't wet enough, or wide enough... Cocks that don't get hard, or that come too soon... Are they trying to tell us something? Are there specific things that we can do, or psychological things, to assist? Are there work-arounds?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
Ep 7: How come the word 'ritual' comes up in relation to sex and bdsm?
Ask some sex-positive kinksters, and you're going to get some interesting answers... What's the difference between routine, and ritual? How does that potentially hinder or boost your sex life? And what exactly have y'all been getting up to in your spare time?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
Ask some sex-positive kinksters, and you're going to get some interesting answers... What's the difference between routine, and ritual? How does that potentially hinder or boost your sex life? And what exactly have y'all been getting up to in your spare time?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
Ep 6: What's the difference between a sex-worker, a sex-therapist, a sex-surrogate, and a sex-coach?
They all involve sex and money, right, but where's the line between one thing and the next? How do you know which one you need? Can you have all of those services in one professional, or even one session? And why don't sex-workers like being called prostitutes?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
They all involve sex and money, right, but where's the line between one thing and the next? How do you know which one you need? Can you have all of those services in one professional, or even one session? And why don't sex-workers like being called prostitutes?
To answer these questions, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! http://www.bliss4women.com.au/
Click here to listen!
Ep 5: What is Tantra?
What is Tantra? Is it some ancient mystic sexual artform, or a modern twist on kink? Perhaps a hybrid love-child of the two? And how does non-binary gender, the beauty myth, and protocols around safer sex fit into whatever tantra is now?
For some great perspectives (that are probably slightly biased towards modern takes on tantra), Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
What is Tantra? Is it some ancient mystic sexual artform, or a modern twist on kink? Perhaps a hybrid love-child of the two? And how does non-binary gender, the beauty myth, and protocols around safer sex fit into whatever tantra is now?
For some great perspectives (that are probably slightly biased towards modern takes on tantra), Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
Ep 4: Can you teach people how to touch?
Can you teach touch? Why are some people able to touch you perfectly, and others not? Can the latter be taught? If so, how... exactly?
Rog (from Curious Creatures), Lorraine and Charlotte tell you all their secrets.
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine is a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She's also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at http://www.charlottesway.net/.
Click here to listen!
Can you teach touch? Why are some people able to touch you perfectly, and others not? Can the latter be taught? If so, how... exactly?
Rog (from Curious Creatures), Lorraine and Charlotte tell you all their secrets.
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine is a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She's also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at http://www.charlottesway.net/.
Click here to listen!
Ep 3: How can I introduce more interesting sex into my relationship?
This is a question that almost all sexual partners face at some stage. It can be stifling and hard to know where to start, however there are some really doable and time-tested solutions from these sexuality experts.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas - World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary 'Urban Tantra' and 'Ecstasy is Necessary'. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell - Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com/, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
This is a question that almost all sexual partners face at some stage. It can be stifling and hard to know where to start, however there are some really doable and time-tested solutions from these sexuality experts.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas - World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary 'Urban Tantra' and 'Ecstasy is Necessary'. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell - Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com/, and also look for her Mindfulness & Intimacy workshop, her Desire series of online workshops, and her Atlas of Erotic Anatomy & Arousal.
Click here to listen!
Ep 2: What can I do about my protruding inner labia?
What can I do about my protruding inner labia? With labiaplasty one of the fastest growing medical procedures, this is a topical question. Listen, as a few body-positive sex educators tackle the problem.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine is a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She is also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at http://www.charlottesway.net/.
Click here to listen!
What can I do about my protruding inner labia? With labiaplasty one of the fastest growing medical procedures, this is a topical question. Listen, as a few body-positive sex educators tackle the problem.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, is joined by:
Lorraine Pentelow - a very compassionate and trained Sexological Bodyworker (a modality that brings sexual theory and touch together as a therapy). Lorraine is a gifted therapist, and can be found at www.lorrainep.com.au.
Charlotte Sway - live sensory artist and fetish escort. Charlotte is a leader in bringing creativity and quirkiness into her considerable skills in kink / bdsm. She is also a trained Sexological Bodyworker, and can be found at http://www.charlottesway.net/.
Click here to listen!
Ep 1: What's your number one sex move?
What's your number one sex move? Is it a little wriggle with your finger at the right time? Something you do with your tongue? Or something entirely psychological?
To answer this question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! www.bliss4women.com.au
Click here to listen!
What's your number one sex move? Is it a little wriggle with your finger at the right time? Something you do with your tongue? Or something entirely psychological?
To answer this question, Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Cath Carter: Renowned sex therapist, counselor, and couples and singles coach. Cath has been in the field of sexuality for thirty years, is a walking embodiment of compassion and sex-positivity, and can be found at www.personalharmony.com.au.
Maureen Matthews: Author of 'About Last Night' in the Sunday Age newspaper, and operator of Bliss for Women. Maureen has been advising and coaching people on sexuality and relationship issues for over thirty years, and making a lot of lives better! www.bliss4women.com.au
Click here to listen!
Featured on '20 Best Podcasts About Sex Positivity of 2021' by Pretty Progressive.
